For many reasons, it can be difficult living with a roommate! This is the point where you may have to settle with the traits and behaviors you do not think are cool. If you both had different backgrounds, you should be ready for a shock. But on the other hand, it is also an opportunity to grow your mind as these difficulties can push you and your roomie to be better people. You could learn how to manage temperaments and even learn things you did not know about yourself.
Are you unsure about how to cohabit or uncertain about where to find shared apartments? While SharedEasy handles the latter, let’s discuss the former.
The Ultimate Guide to Cohabit With Roomies
When living with roommates, the golden rule is more apparent than ever, so while you are looking forward to having a great time, here’s how;
Be Respectful To Personal Space and Property
Asides from the fact that no relationship can go far without respect, it is always a great feeling to be respected by people around us, and your roommate is not an exception. Always be on the lookout for a change in tone or body language, be careful not to encroach into their personal space, make sure you do not ask too many personal questions when you see that they are uncomfortable with answering, in times like these, allow them to have their alone time. Also, it can be tough to handle simple stuff like the noise and shenanigans going on around you when two or more individuals live together. People, strangely enough, create sounds as living, independent beings. But, if you work from home or you are a student, it may be important to set aside some time for peace and quiet so that you can be comfortable and focused while working at home – always remember this works both ways.
Picking up or mismanaging their personal property is not a nice thing to do, treat theirs the same way you will want someone to treat yours. And do not borrow without asking.
Clear Communication is Vital
If you can go about life with a handful of skills/values then you might not have a lot of problems cohabiting. Being able to communicate clearly and concisely can keep you out of many questionable situations, but that is not all, here, it will help foster a great relationship between you and your roommate.
From clear communication, you and your roommate can understand each other properly, you will understand what and what not to do for/to yourselves to avoid ‘fights’. Consider everything that could lead to an issue in the future and address it immediately. Writing notes gives the impression that you are passive-aggressive. Also, think about your habits, both positive and negative, and how they affect others, such as your roommate. It’s critical to be aware of each other’s preferences.
An easy way to go about this is by creating a relationship with your roommate outside of being just roommates; you can visit the gym together, the coffee shop, the movies, or the mall – the goal here is to have other things in common rather than just being roomies, these moments will surely help with knowing yourselves better.
Get to Know Yourselves Early On
It does not matter how amazing a person appears on paper, your personalities may not always mix well enough to create a happy living environment. Even if you’re simply attempting to save up some cash by moving into a new home in the same neighborhood where you already live, you need to be sure that anyone you choose as your new roommate is someone you can get along well with within tight proximity, or in this case, the same room.
You and your roomie must not be best of friends, but you both should be able to get along and maintain a conversation for longer than three minutes if you’re going to be in the same room. Try meeting up with your potential roommate in person if you have the chance. Sitting down with someone and seeing their gestures can often reveal more about them than simply speaking over text.
If you’re relocating and also don’t know anyone, do everything within your power to get to know your future roommate before moving in. Whether it’s through texting or, better yet, FaceTiming, try to gather as much knowledge as you can about them to avoid moving in and discovering that your personalities aren’t compatible.
Discuss Boundaries Too
Another way to handle any problems that could come up in the future between you and your roommate is through discussing your boundaries early, you both can have this conversation before or after moving in, but the earlier it is done, the better.
Maybe you both will get along fine if you share food and split the shopping bill in half, but ensure you do not presume that it will be this way without first discussing it. Be clear on what quantity of food you will share. Would cooking be done together? Have these conversations and many more.
What about visitors? Discuss your house rules for entertaining guests. Are you both fine with people coming and going as you please, or would you want to be given advance notice? How long ahead of time should you notify your roommate about your guests? How long will your visitors be able to stay? Your answers to all these questions, as well as your roommate’s, will allow you to find common ground and reach an agreement about the visitors who will be entering and exiting your shared area.
Have and Show Empathy
Sometimes, life doesn’t go the way that we want it to, and those times are when we need supportive people to cheer us up. We could be left feeling at a loss, making it difficult to do things we could easily do before the time.
Several factors can dampen our mood or ability to perform chores around the house like a breakup, a school project, the loss of a friend, or preparing for an exam, and so on.
Being empathetic in times like this will help nurture your relationship in no small way. What would you have them do for you if you were in their position?
Understanding and accepting that we all have flaws is a vital point to note in our relationships with people – this is why we should not focus on those flaws as they will only make us dislike them. Always lookout for the good in your roommate – this is a sure way to reach an agreement.